Friday, August 20, 2010

It comes down to this

I need a shorter photographer. I'd like to believe my legs look nicer than this.
Dress Gap (yeah I seem to be in a rut)
Necklace Dominique Cohen for Target
Striped cami, earrings, bangles H&M
Ring gift
Shoes Jeffrey Campbell via Nordstrom

Yeah so this is how I had been feeling lately. A lot of stuff kinda happened at once and I was overwhelmed. I am not complaining so much as stating how my behavior was. I am a terrible liar too. I am bad at hiding anger. I can hide a lot of emotions but that one comes out in my eyes.


Wanting to scream but kinda laughing while I do it because nothing was in my control that was getting to me. Then I had a conversation that changed everything. I said how I was feeling as mature a manner as I could muster and I was listened to. My thoughts validated and heard and I felt great. I honestly felt like I was badly doggie paddling for my life and someone threw me some floaties. Why do we fight ourselves so damn much sometimes? Sometimes you just need to get it off your chest! And sometimes you just feel like you need someone to hear you.Yes sometimes you just need to shut the hell up about things but this wasn't one of those times. I think it is hard for others to be around you when they can tell you're upset and want you to just admit it already. So I did and I feel oddly liberated. Dave and one of my dear friends just knew all the right things to say too. My mom gets me the most "who do I have to hurt baby?" aww she know my soft spot.

But you know what? My troubles? They are nothing. People have really scary shit happening to them and I hope I never come off like I think my problems are worse. A very dear person to me has been threatened with his life. Has people harassing him and defacing his business. My heart aches for him. He did nothing to deserve this. I care deeply for him and know he is one of the most amazing people on this planet and others that don't see that? They aren't worthy of knowing him.

Sorry to get heavy on ya. I never claimed it was a fashion blog. actually that is the subtitle ;) Unfollow if you don't like it.

So go hug someone. Pick someone you haven't hugged in awhile. Or someone you have never before because sometimes that is all someone needs. (this is coming from a nonhugger)


david said...


Melissa said...

Yeah...I'm a non-hugger too. I'd rather write a really nice email to someone. Will that work too?

By the way, I think your legs look just fine.

I'm so glad you were able to talk it out and get it off your chest. Sometimes that really is all we need to make things better. Not someone to tell us what we *should* do to fix it, we just need someone to listen and understand. I'm glad you got that!

And I really hope your friend is able to get the dumb people put in jail!

Kelly said...

I'm so happy you had someone to listen to you talk about whatever was tearing you down. I'm not good about talking about my feelings. I just sort of shut down. But you're right - when you tell someone and talk it through and someone listens, everything can feel so much lighter and easier and surmountable.


Clare said...

You've been writing some seriously touching posts this week. Each one has hit home in a very real way. I'm sorry things have been overwhelming, but I'm so glad that you had people to listen and kick some ass for you.

Emily B. said...

I'm so proud of you. xoxo